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Thread: New Random Video Game Thread

  1. #91
    can't be bothered Eldorian's Avatar
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    Prowling the edges of dangerous waters where storms and large reefs were common, the Captain and his crew would pick out the most stricken merchant vessels limping out of a storm, then swiftly close in.

    Once their pirate ship was alongside the merchant vessel however, the pirates wouldn't then go all cannons and cutlass on their prey. Instead, they would signal over to the merchant vessel, offering to repair the damage to their ship for but a small fee. Having barely survived the storm and taking in more water than they could bail, the crew of the merchant vessels would readily agree.

    Once payment had been made, the Pirate Captain would send five of his own crew to board the merchant vessel, along with a large wooden crate of tools. They would then proceed below decks and start work.

    Unbeknownst to the crew of the merchant vessel, two of the Captain's most stealthiest pirates were hiding in the large wooden crate of tools. Once below decks, they would pop out and get to work too, raiding the hold of the merchant vessel and taking all the valuables, jewels and gold pieces they could get their hands on.

    Quickly tossing their spoils into the large wooden crate, the other two would then work alongside the other five once the crate was full. When the repairs were complete and the seven crewmen had returned with the crate full of booty, the pirate ship would depart as swiftly as it had arrived, before the the crew of the merchant vessel noticed anything was missing.

    Bragging about his ill-gotten gains amassed using this tactic, the Pirate Captain was booed and jeered at by his counterparts for employing such dishonourable methods. His reply?

    "Arrr.. it's not loot-boxes I be using! They be the surprise mechanics, and they be quite ethical.."

 

  • #92
    Pony Up! Ovinomancer's Avatar
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    Thanks for that. If I ever need a pretentious, "look how clever I am," bad analogy for "loot boxes suck," I now have this.
    Quote Originally Posted by PWD View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member.
    I think ovi's right.

  • #93
    can't be bothered Eldorian's Avatar
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    I think you completely missed the joke, but what else is new.

    edit: why would you even comment on that joke if you didn't get it? It makes no sense out of context. It's not even "pretentious", just nonsensical. Jesus you are just a humorless douchebag.
    Last edited by Eldorian; June 22nd, 2019 at 10:31 PM.

  • #94
    Pony Up! Ovinomancer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eldorian View Post
    I think you completely missed the joke, but what else is new.

    edit: why would you even comment on that joke if you didn't get it? It makes no sense out of context. It's not even "pretentious", just nonsensical. Jesus you are just a humorless douchebag.
    Nope. I'm up to date on EA stupid. Understanding the reference doesn't make it funny. Honestly, if you think this is grand humor worth sharing, I'm sorry you're stunted like that. This has bad framing, shitty timing, and a forced punchline. You should find better jokes -- just referencing recent events and putting shitty companies in your punchline doesn't make it funny.

    Edit: wait, this is yours, isn't it? You didn't C&P it, you wrote it? Heh. That would explain a lot.
    Quote Originally Posted by PWD View Post
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    I think ovi's right.

  • #95
    can't be bothered Eldorian's Avatar
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    Ovinomancer and talking about shit he doesn't know anything about, name a more iconic duo...

    https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comme...n_interesting/

  • #96
    Pony Up! Ovinomancer's Avatar
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    Eldo and failing to understand question marks.

    But, cool, it's only a moderate mark of shitty humor that you thought thar post on reddit worthy of C&P, not the pathetic one of having wrote it.
    Quote Originally Posted by PWD View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member.
    I think ovi's right.

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